Your Questions, Answered

I'm a lucky girl.  I get to speak with prospective surrogates every day.  I truly enjoy explaining the process to them, answering their questions and hopefully settling some of their concerns and fears.  There are a few questions that I'm asked on a very regular basis, and I figured if all of these prospective surrogates are asking the same questions, surely others are wondering the same thing, and so why not address those questions here?

Q:  Is it really hard to give up the babies?

A:  Simply put, NO.

I was surprised however, to realize how much I loved the babies so early on in the pregnancy.  It hardly seems possible, but I love them even more today - with all my heart.  Although I knew from the beginning that they were not my babies, I protected them, and would continue to protect them to this day as if they were my own. I believe the reason I fell so in love with them so quickly was because of the relationship I had formed with their Daddies.  I think most of us surrogates know deep down that we will be able to "give up" the babies, long before we ever decide to become a surrogate.  But there's always the unknown - what will it truly feel like to "give up" a baby or babies that I've carried for 9 months?  The truth?  For me, neither my mind, nor my body, nor my heart had any trouble giving birth to babies and watching as a family of 2 became a family of 4.  It was one of the most amazing moments of my life and the memories of that time are all positive.  It truly is not hard to give up the babies.

Q:  Do you keep in touch with the parents?

A:  Anyone who is a regular reader of this blog knows the answer to this one.  Absolutely, we still keep in touch!  I feel like the luckiest girl on the planet to have an ongoing relationship with George and Farid, and it's a pretty incredible feeling to know that I have been given the opportunity to watch the twins grow up via pictures and videos.  Although they are SO big now and it's hard for me to remember that they were ever tiny little babies, I feel extremely blessed to have been "present" as they've grown.

Q:  Would you do it again?
*This question has been asked by more than just prospective surrogates... MANY of you have also inquired about this very thing!  Drumroll....I'm finally answering your question.

A:  Yes, I'd love to have another journey.  I'd love to add to, or complete George and Farid's family if and when they choose to do so.

My life has changed so much in the last year.  I've started my career in this field and it keeps me very busy and incredibly satisfied.  I'm a busy single mom.  So much of a surrogacy journey for me was and is about the incredible relationship that is formed between 2 families.  Farid and George know me, and my family knows them.  We trust each other.  The relationship is already there and solid. To share another journey with them would be amazing in so many ways.

That being said, it's a pretty great feeling to also know that I am 100% okay if another journey does not occur.  I'm so happy with my life - with all that I have done and all that I am doing.

Surrogacy has drastically changed my life.  I experienced it first hand, and now I experience it on a daily basis through others. I'm extremely satisfied with it all.

So I'll say here what I say to many others.  If Farid and George decide that they would like to add to their family via surrogacy, I'd be honored to carry for them again.  If not, I will proudly retire this uterus.  3 healthy pregnancies, 4 healthy babies ~ She done good.

Be Alive

Call it an eye opener, an 'aha' moment, a revelation.  Whatever you want to call it, it's happened.  I'm so grateful to have had this realization relatively early on in what I hope will be this long life of mine.

Things that come naturally to me:

I'm a rule follower - big time.  You tell me it needs or is supposed to be done, and it is done.
I'm a people pleaser.  Which can sometimes create...
An overachiever.  Which can be a good thing because it makes me...
A hard worker.

Those who know me well also know that I have a difficult time doing anything "just so-so".  I generally commit everything I've got to anything I take on.

Good or bad, these characteristics are me - and I'm proud of me.  But I'm even more proud of me now that I've learned (and continue to learn) what I see as the deeper, more important goal for my life.

Every now and again (ok, maybe a little more often than that) the above characteristics were tempting me into missing moments.  Passing on something I'd love to do because I'd have too much work to do.  Avoiding an evening out so that I didn't stray from my health/fitness goals.  Missing moments.

Until the following became so very clear to me:

This life I've been given is a gift - a gift that has an unknown expiration date.  I'm pretty sure I've got a nice, long life to live and it's incredibly important to me that I have no regrets.  I'm quite certain that when my time is up, I will feel proud of how hard I've worked, how loyal I've been and that I've played by the rules.  I'm also quite certain that what will stand out the most are the moments.  Moments I refuse to miss.

There will always be work - that's a great thing because I love to work and I love what I'm doing.  I am so thrilled that my health and fitness has become a priority for me.  The time I have with family and friends mean more to me than anything else.  There IS space and time for all of it.

I will always be a rule follower.  A trustworthy, hard working people pleaser.  I will also live and experience life to the fullest.  If it makes me happy, I will do it.

I'm alive.  And I will never, EVER take that for granted.

The Week - Thankful for...

After posting this post, I decided I would make a point to document as often as possible all of the things I've GOTTEN to do.  All of the opportunities I've had and the things I'm so thankful for.  In short, focusing on the positive.

So here you have it.  This week:

1.  I learned that I am lucky enough to be welcoming a new nephew to this world sometime this summer.  I'm so in love with him already.

2.  I've slept really well.

3.  I heard birds chirping first thing in the morning.  Signs of SPRING!

4.  I was invited to be a travel companion/support person for a good friend's upcoming transfer.  *SuPeR eXcItEd!* Blog post to follow.

5.  I slipped on ice and fell flat on my arse in the Target parking lot. Once on the way into Target and once on the way out.  Awesome.  Thankful for the fact that I wasn't badly injured.  And also for the fact that I am able to laugh at myself (after dropping an F bomb or two.)

6.  Dyed/decorated 60 (yes, sixty) Easter eggs with my girls.

7.  Bought a new pair of running shoes that made ALL the difference in my workout.  So much of a difference that I managed a brief jog in my very next workout - only for one minute, and not at a very fast pace, but RUNNING!    Did you hear me?!?! Running!  Who woulda thunk I'd ever be able to say that?  Not me.

8.  Aaaannnndddd......drumroll please.....one of those movies I thought I'd never have time for? Watched it.  Les Mis - totally worth the wait.

Happy week everyone.  What are you grateful to have experienced this week?