Tuesday, December 13, 2011

The Tale Of 3 Fishies...

...Well, actually 4.

Saturday night I went to my sister's annual Christmas Party.  This party always includes one of those gift exchanges where people can "steal" gifts from one another. It can get brutal to say the least.  This group of friends is always very clever with the gifts and this year was no exception.  One of the gifts that was brought was a goldfish.  The guy who got the goldfish was not the kind of guy who wanted a goldfish.  At all.  :-)  I feared for this fish. I felt sad for this fish.  I had a feeling this fish would meet Mr. Toilet as soon as he got home...IF he ever made it home!

So I stole that gift.

And I loved that fish.

The first time we set eyes on each other, he puffed up his gills, gave me fishie lips and I knew he loved me back.

I drove home very carefully that night with the fish in my lap.

As soon as I woke up the next day, I drove straight to the pet store to get fish food.  Shortly thereafter, the girls and I decided together that this fish was named Hank.  I filled a nice, giant vase with water and waited for it to reach room temperature before I transferred Hank to his new home.  I was excited for Hank's world to be a little brighter in his new habitat.  I had outfitted the glass vase with black rock at the bottom, a nice green plant and some yellow flowers for a splash of color.  (Splash!  Get it! Haha!) It was the perfect home for my little Hank.  I transferred him to the vase and enjoyed watching him swim around with delight!  He gurgled to me: "Thank you, Jeni!  I love my new home!"

2 hours later...Hank was dead. 

Totally floating! 

Skyler and Savannah freaked!

I found it ironic!  I had rescued Hank from a supposed untimely death and here he was...dead as a doornail! I like to think he died a happy man...er...I mean fish.  :-)

Yesterday I found myself back at the pet store.  This time I would get a Betta fish.  They're hardier, prettier and still cheap as dirt!  :)  You may already know that male Bettas cannot live together.  They will fight to the death.  But females live in peace without so much as an argument!  I find this phenomenon fascinating!  I decided on 3 female Bettas. 

Their names?  What Else?  Phoebe, Rachel and Monica!

Phoebe dove in first.  She checked the place out and seemed to approve.  I added Monica a couple hours later.  Monica really wanted to play with Phoebe but Phoebe was quite shy.  Monica quickly learned to swim up slowly to Phoebe and just "hang out" NEAR her so she wouldn't get scared.  About an hour later, in goes Rachel.  Rachel is the prettiest of the 3 with her teal scales and long tail.  The 3 girls together at last!  Life is good.

Not so much.

Turns out...Rachel is a bully!  She'd puff up her cheeks and dart after Phoebe and Monica who would swim for their lives, gurgling, "Help us, Jeni!"  I gave the girls a bit of time to possibly work through the situation themselves, but after a while, Rachel was really starting to piss me off!  She needed to be removed from the situation! Pronto!  Before someone got hurt!  Quick as a whip I got a Dixie cup, (yes...I forgot to get a fish net from the pet store) sprinkled in a little fish food so Rachel would swim to the top (she attacked both of the other fish on her way to the top) and I trapped that girl before she ever knew what was going on! *Insert evil laugh!*

Monica and Phoebe were a little shaken at first but before long, they resumed their happy, peaceful life together in their beautiful tank. 

The moral of the story?

If you can't play nicely with everyone else...

...you end up in an old piece of tupperware.

This story is based on real fish. 
No fish were harmed during the telling of this story.
If you're feeling sorry for Rachel, don't.
She's getting her own vase with black rock, green plant
...and yellow flowers. 
But she doesn't get any friends. 
Perhaps this is the way she likes it.


  1. OMG. Is it bad that I laughed through that whole thing?

    Sorry Hank.

    And Rachel, good luck with your solitude lifestyle.

  2. HAHA! Be careful - we had a goldfish that we won at the fair one year and that thing lived like 5 years!! It just would not die and I couldnt just flush it cause thats horrible - thank goodness we eventually found "Blue" a new home...LOL

  3. You may just be the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life (besides my daughter)!!!

  4. My brother and I won fish at a carnival years ago. Mine died. My parents bought me another one. Mine died. My parents bought a third. I named him Lucky 7 hoping he'd live. He died. My brother's fish continued to live. Goldfish are definitely not known for being hearty!

  5. I laughed through the whole thing too! Friends being my favorite show, I love the names you gave your fish. Goldfish are definitely not hearty...aparently they crap so much in their water you have to change it a lot lol


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...