Wednesday, August 1, 2012


I am not a very political person.  Scratch that.  In the past, I was not a very political person.  My political beliefs have changed.  Drastically.

I don't know if you've heard, but there's a bit of an uproar regarding recent statements made by Chick-fil-A CEO Dan Cathy.

Oh...You've heard.

I do not wish to get into a huge debate here, but let me just say this about that. Does Mr. Cathy have a right to say what he did?  Sure he does.  Is Mr. Cathy realizing that there are just a few other folks out there who also have the right to speak their opinion?  I'm thinkin' he's realizing this....a few million sandwiches less at a time.  Freedom of speech does not mean that you do not have to endure the ramifications of your words.

Obviously, word of Mr. Cathy's statement has spread like wildfire on Facebook. My personal news feed shows some Chick-fil-A supporters here and there. And then there are the surrogates.  Smart, beautiful, full of life and passion surrogates.  I love you all.  These women are consistently posting about equality.  You can feel their passion in each and every post.
They're loud.  They're proud.

Many surrogates, myself included, have been given the opportunity to share close relationships with individuals who happen to be gay.  We witness first hand the love that these individuals have for one another.  We get to share in the moment that they learn they're pregnant.  We see the joy on their faces as their pregnancy progresses and we witness first hand the emotion that comes with a baby being born - a family being created.  Because of this, we become very defensive about the fact that these people we love so very much are not given the same rights as everyone else.

The same rights.

Everyone is different.  Not a single one of us is exactly the same as anyone else.  We all have different opinions.  We have different beliefs.  This is acceptable and good!  We ALL have the right to think and believe what we want. But do any of us have the right to determine someone else's basic human rights?   Think about it.  Someone once felt they had the right to say:


And here we are in Two Thousand Twelve and we're telling people:



I would encourage those who do not believe in equality to take a moment - just one moment - to consider your own personal family.  Suppose your child or future grandchild reveals to you that they are gay.  Would you change your mind then?  Suppose someone made a huge impact on your life...imagine if a gay man or woman saved your life or the life of your child.  Could you look that person in the eye and support the fact that they are not given the same rights that you have?  We are talking about PEOPLE here...human beings. It's really quite simple.

To all of my fellow surrogates and equal rights supporters:  Keep up the good work!  I am so proud to know you all!  I'm proud of the fact that we are comfortable speaking out for equal rights.  We're making a difference!  On Facebook...and beyond.

By the way, if you and I are not already connected on Facebook and you'd like to be, let's make that happen!  Jeni on Facebook


  1. SAY IT AGAIN JENI!!!! Love this post!!!

  2. Great post Jeni!
    Time is on our side. In 15 years I've gone from a family that was ready to write me off for being gay to seeing my parents embrace MY family and their grandson. People are afraid of what they don't know. I'm so happy angels like you are raising the next generation :)

  3. I'm so proud of you, Jeni, for standing up and speaking out. I'm so done with all the judgment and oppression. It hurts us all.

  4. I've been consumed with this all day long crying for the disappointment in so many of the people I know. (Maybe the Lupron working against me a little? I feel like a rage-full wreck about all this.) I can not understand how people, some of my very own friends, find it exciting to actually take a stand AGAINST other humans. I appreciate your reminder Kevin - you are right we are advancing and I am proof of that. I was able to break away from what I was raised to believe and see the truth and the next generation is being raised differently! Thank you Jeni for saying it more eloquently than I have been saying it today. :)

  5. Certainly you must be my long lost sister. I have a post about this started. I just couldn't seem to spit out exactly what is in my head. I'm reading this and thinking "yep" "yep" "yep". Nice job!!

  6. Thank you thank you thank you for your continued support and love for our community!

  7. I have a problem with any person trying to force their own belief upon another person. The sad thing about this is that the owner of Chic-fil-a did not and does not force his belief on anyone, he merely stated his own personal conviction, which in this free country, he has the right to do. Someone ignorantly grabbed hold of that personal opinion and tried to destroy his company (Thank you Rham Emanuel). This specific company doesn't discriminate and that's the important issue here. The publicity did not do anything positive for the gay cause but to create contention and more separation. What I hear with all of this is that if you state your opinion, that's free speech, but if this man states his, it's hate and intollerance? As the mother of a gay child, I was saddened to see the all out drama and focus on one man's belief system when we have much more serious issues to deal with. Of course I want everyone to love my perfect and wonderful gay son and I would fight to my death for him, but we also have to accept that not all people will agree and they have that right. Fighting with them will not change their view and taking away their freedom to a personal opinion would ultimately restrict everyone. Government can not mandate someone's faith, nor can they mandate someone's sexuality. :)


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